The 40/70 Rule: Talk Now Rather Than Later

When you reach 40 or your parents reach 70 it's time to talk.
As hard as it may seem, talking with your aging parents about tough issues is easier now than it will be later.

The quality of communication between adult children and their senior parents leaves a lot to be desired, according to a study from the senior care company Home Instead. The findings of the study led researchers to coin the phrase "the 40/70 rule."

"This means that if you are 40, or your parents are 70, it's time to start talking about sensitive topics," says James Cooke of Home Instead Senior Care. "Waiting until the senior parent is 80 or older, when there is increasing likelihood of more severe health issues, can lead to problems."

Adult children generally find that the most difficult topics to tackle are those that deal with independence issues, for example, talking with their parents about leaving their home for a retirement residence, assisted-living facility, or nursing home, as well as financial matters and driving issues.

The quality of communications seems to be influenced by the gender of the parent, topic of conversation, and whether the parent lives with the child. Forty-seven percent said it was easier to communicate with their senior mother; only 8 percent said it was easier to communicate with their senior father. The study also found that family communications may be more difficult when senior parents live with their Boomer-aged children.

Comments

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.
Please Feedback to the Editors Do you have thoughts on an ADVISOR site, publication, or article? Do you have a Boomer Years story to share? Please click here to contact the Editors. You'll be helping us give you the information and advice you need. Also, you can discuss a specific story topic with other readers by using the article's Comment form.

Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right.