Erma Bombeck

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you're fat.

You know, just once I'd like to meet an alien menace that wasn't immune to bullets.

Doctor Who

Small though it is, the human brain can be quite effective when used properly.

Doctor Who

The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views. Which can be uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that needs altering.

Doctor Who

A straight line may be the shortest distance between two points, but it is by no means the most interesting.

Bart Simpson

I didn't think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows.

Homer Simpson

Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Homer Simpson

Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!

Captain John Sheridan

If the primates that we came from had known that someday politicians would come out of the gene pool, they'd've stayed up in the trees and written evolution off as a bad idea.

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