Don't get even, get odder.
You may not mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path.
Politicians are like diapers: They should be changed regularly and for the same reason.
Stupidity got us into this mess -- why can't it get us out?
A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected. A carefully planned project takes four times longer to complete than expected, mostly because the planners expect their planning to reduce the time it takes.
Good news is just life's way of keeping you off balance.
Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car.
On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the ESC key.
I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.
Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.