Patriotism is your conviction that your country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it.
Frogs have it easy. They eat what bugs them.
What does it mean when you make a mistake and nobody notices it?
It doesn't take many square meals to make a round middle.
It isn't the minutes at the table that add pounds. It's the seconds!
A word of advice: Don't give it.
Ever notice how many dead people come alive at 5:00PM?
Must be something to reincarnation. It's hard to believe I could get this far behind in one lifetime!
Impromptu: show business talk for disorganized.
Count Dracula never worked a day in his life.