I'm Sorry I Made You Cry, But At Least Your Face Is Cleaner
Why do they call a building a building, if it's already built?
How to get $$$$ quickly: Hold down the shift key and press the "4" key four times.
You know you're a geek if... you know more digits of Pi than people.
You know you're a geek if... YUAFE (you use acronyms for everything).
You know you're slow when you come in third in a two-person race.
We're having a heatwave. Be sure to wave back!
Living your life is like shaving; no matter how well you do it today, you still gotta do it tomorrow.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
Men with pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.