If a funeral procession is at night, do they drive with their lights off?

Dilbert

Reading is knowledge. Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Corruption is a crime. Crime doesn't pay. Therefore, if you keep reading you'll go broke.

We spend the first year our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next 15 years telling them to sit down and shut up.

There were four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done!

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